you are the ambulance

by christian fitness

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Triakel thumbnail
Triakel I love this album for the same reasons I love old Fall and Morrissey albums. It's funny, smart, bracing, musically interesting, and infectiously catchy. Lyrics that improve with repetition. Maybe those aren't the best comparisons (Both Morrissey and MES are/were bigger pricks than I suspect Andrew Falkous is), but that's what I've got. That's the spot this stuff hits. Favorite track: the brain is not a lever.
Adam Kuhn
Adam Kuhn thumbnail
Adam Kuhn i had actually remarked to myself (i am not in the habit of 'remarking' to others, i find it jarring) that the vocals sounded really good; the whole mix is excellent. i'm not certain why but something about the mix is reminding me of nomeansno in the andy kerr 0+2=1 years. anyway great job thumbs up yes very clever etc. Favorite track: health pt.2.
whisperingfist thumbnail
whisperingfist This is a cracking album Falco, especially optics of a nurse and getting stuck is funny sometimes. It's properly whet my appetite for a new FOTL album. How's that coming along? Favorite track: getting stuck is funny sometimes.
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  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    artwork from michael byzewski of aesthetic apparatus! what more could a person want! gatefold, words, pictures. smells, even (that'll be the print)

    Includes unlimited streaming of you are the ambulance via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 28 days
    Purchasable with gift card

      £9 GBP or more 




(please note - the above image is not, i repeat NOT the album cover, only a very nice placeholder while Michael Byzewski, king of covers, fully brews one )

SOOOOOOOO ... christian fitness album number 6 (SIX) is here after a mixing period which can only be described as protracted - basically, i heard some recordings by some hOt neW bands where the vocals were mixed so stupidly loud that it made me go the other way out of fear and spite until those close to me - including myself - arranged an intervention. All should be hear-able now, and if not, make your own record(*). Answers to some questions (1) no (2) sometimes (3) i make them up as I go along. (warning - questions may vary).

I am very proud of this thing, despite my flippant and, at times, seductive language.

it'll be the usual deal with the cd pre-order - buy now (or y'know, now-ish) and get the digital straight away then the cds when they're printed up (basically, when I've raised enough cash, which last time was almost five weeks in, because i was a tardy fucker).



ps. if you want to buy single songs that's on you but i think you're crazy

(*) seriously, do it, making records is great


released May 29, 2019

as ever (well, the last four records) Steffan Pringle recorded - and ate considerably less chocolate than last time - Jack Egglestone (also of mclusky and future of the left) listened and drummed - often at the same time - and Anthony Chapman mastered-mastered. I love them all in their own ways.

additional thanks to Music Box, Cardiff, for providing an excellent space in which to record, again, and John Pullman for loaning me a couple of basses. again, it's love, with and without tissues. And Ella, of course, for dancing throughout the writing process. x


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christian fitness Cardiff, UK

one 'man'. band. NOT a solo artist. all songs created by imagined multiple personalities, some of which are shy. six records out now. drums by friends, recording by other friends, everything else by this prick. enjoy or get gone. x

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