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you are the ambulance

by christian fitness

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colin-the-very-pretty-pussy thumbnail
colin-the-very-pretty-pussy I used to say my favourite band was Future of the Left.
Now I just say I am a good Christian man.
A fit one, at that Favorite track: you can stand on one leg (but you shouldn't).
slappedarse thumbnail
slappedarse "Falco's best since Rock me Amadeus" as Eichmann was heard to mutter under his breath as they led him away.

This whole album kicks bottom with authority and attitude.
Impossible to pick the best track because each one is better than the last regardless of which order you listen to them in.

Good to see the old riff from love missile f1-11 getting an airing on health pt.2 as well :) Favorite track: newly colonised moon.
James Stewart
James Stewart thumbnail
James Stewart you can not buy this album (but you shouldn't) Favorite track: you can stand on one leg (but you shouldn't).
more... more...
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    Purchasable with gift card

      £7 GBP  or more


  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    artwork from michael byzewski of aesthetic apparatus! what more could a person want! gatefold, words, pictures. smells, even (that'll be the print)

    Includes unlimited streaming of you are the ambulance via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 3 days
    Purchasable with gift card

      £9 GBP or more 


real tennis 01:58
health pt.1 01:59
health pt.2 02:27


SOOOOOOOO ... christian fitness album number 6 (SIX) is here after a mixing period which can only be described as protracted - basically, i heard some recordings by some hOt neW bands where the vocals were mixed so stupidly loud that it made me go the other way out of fear and spite until those close to me - including myself - arranged an intervention. All should be hear-able now, and if not, make your own record(*). Answers to some questions (1) no (2) sometimes (3) i make them up as I go along. (warning - questions may vary).

I am very proud of this thing, despite my flippant and, at times, seductive language.

it'll be the usual deal with the cd pre-order - buy now (or y'know, now-ish) and get the digital straight away then the cds when they're printed up (basically, when I've raised enough cash, which last time was almost five weeks in, because i was a tardy fucker).



ps. if you want to buy single songs that's on you but i think you're crazy

(*) seriously, do it, making records is great


released May 29, 2019

as ever (well, the last four records) Steffan Pringle recorded - and ate considerably less chocolate than last time - Jack Egglestone (also of mclusky and future of the left) listened and drummed - often at the same time - and Anthony Chapman mastered-mastered. I love them all in their own ways.

additional thanks to Music Box, Cardiff, for providing an excellent space in which to record, again, and John Pullman for loaning me a couple of basses. again, it's love, with and without tissues. And Ella, of course, for dancing throughout the writing process. x


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